Do you ever have times when you just doubt everything you're doing?
Two bouts of hospitalisation this year (first husband and then littest one) have really shaken me. Bigger is really unsettled, littler has turned back into a velcro baby and work is...well, a bit pants really.
Which leaves me doubting everything.
I usually love my job. It's a nice job, I get paid reasonably well and on the whole, the people I work with are pretty decent. But a whole load of boring politics has crept in lately and it's left a bit of a sour taste in my mouth to be honest.
I find I'm yearning for the days of freelance again. Yet I can't face the financial uncertainty that would bring.
I'm also a bit sick of writing about stuff I don't really care about (which is what I do for a job essentially - write what other people want me to write in order to sell stuff). I want to write more of this sort of stuff and this and this.
I want to be at home more and spend more time on the school run (whaaaaat? I know, crazy). But I'm reluctant to lose out financially.
I don't know what the answer is. I guess I'm looking for the holy grail of working parents everywhere - more time at home with the children while still being rewarded financially and maintaining a good standard of living.
Yeah, I know...almost impossible.
So how do you all balance the whole work/family life thing?